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Writer's picturePhilip

Let's Talk Wedding Party - To Have and to Hold or Maybe Just Let Go

The wedding party is considered to be the inner circle inside the wedding circle of friends and family. It's made up of those people who know you all too well, are willing to drop what they're doing, and travel all that way to enhance your wedding day. But, will the people you selected actually enhance your day or stress you to the max? Let's talk about it!

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The first big question to ask yourself: do you even need a wedding party?


I'm sure you probably already have a list if you're even considering this question, so we'll throw our pros and cons out on the table for you to pick and choose.

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To NOT Have a Wedding Party:

Pros

  • No family drama about picking siblings/relatives

  • No need to find an equal amount of people on both party sides

  • No waiting on party members to get ready, dressed, and show up on time

  • No wrangling of party members for group photos

  • No need to order or coordinate their suits/dresses for your wedding

  • No need to spend money on wedding party gifts

  • No pressure deciding who your maid of honor/best man will be (a.k.a. “top friend”)


Cons

  • Not having someone directly to help during the day or to help you de-stress

  • Not having designated people that will throw you showers, parties, etc.


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To HAVE a Wedding Party:

Pros

  • You have your people with you to brighten your day

  • They're there to help with anything you need

  • They bring the “party,” hopefully and especially at the reception

  • Potentially have more interesting photos throughout the day


Cons 

  • Feeling pressured to spend time or focus on each party member

  • Paying some major cash for those infamous party gifts

  • Essentially ranking your people by choice of maid of honor or best man

  • Potentially paying for their rental suits or help buying dresses

  • Potential drama and jealousy on your wedding day

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Okay, it wasn't my goal to hate on having a wedding party, but as you can see above, there are a few cons involved with deciding to have a wedding party.


Our suggestion would be somewhere in the middle. Have a wedding party but keep it on the smaller side, like 3-4 people each. No matter what you decide, the most important thing to stress about this topic is to absolutely ensure that your selection of your party includes people who are there for you and ready to serve you on your day. The worst situation we've experienced as photographers is seeing bridesmaids who make things like hair and makeup about them, delaying the bride's timeline and stressing her out. As well, groomsmen who are concerned with looking sharp and getting drunk, which only adds to the drama of the day.

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Here are some qualifying criteria that you can use when making the decision on who to include in your wedding party:

  • Do they have a positive personality?

  • Are they generally helpful of others?

  • Are they self-absorbed?

  • Are they sociable?

  • Are they reliable?

  • Are they organized?

  • Are they punctual?

  • Are they easily distracted?

  • Do they need some babysitting?

  • Do they gravitate toward drama?

  • Can they handle intoxicating substances?


May these lists be of help and may the force be with you!

Best of luck,

Philip

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